Out of Isolation

Having seen some old friends return on here over the last few days I decided I have three ways of treating this blog:

1 Carry on as I have done these last few months- dipping in and out – making the occasional comment and infrequent post

2 Ending the blog on the basis that I have nothing more of real value to say

3 Reengaging with the blog in a new way; with a commitment to reading, commenting and posting on a more regular basis

Option 1 doesn’t really work for me . As in my drinking days I’m an all or nothing type of guy so this option doesn’t do it for me. Maybe it reminds me of previous relationships; one foot in, one foot out.

Option 2 would work in the short term but would feel like abandoning something that has helped me enormously and maybe even helped others in small ways. That’s it then, it has to be Option 3; coming out of blog isolation. I need a proper reengagement; not the manic engagement of my first few months on here but regular posting and reading. Sometimes it takes something simple like someone saying they like reading one’s posts to realise that we do this fundamentally in order to connect. Sure I like to entertain sometimes in my posts, maybe (that means definitely) I also like the feeling of my fragile ego bathed in the warm glow of feedback sometimes. More recently I had to experience a negative response not just to my posts but to me as a person. I think that unnerved me more than I realised . In Transactional Analysis talk it took me back to my Child ego state; once again reexperiencing the criticism of father and brother, believing that maybe I was a fake, that I was a crap person and wanting to lash out like a child. It was a good reminder to self about how fragile we can be despite the insights we gain and how important it is to respond as Adult. It proved to be a valuable lesson. That’s the thing with connection we can’t control how it’s going to go and how it may affect us but it’s better to take that risk than stay isolated.

Well that’s the navel gazing out the way. Isolation in my title also refers to the past couple of weeks where I self isolated following finding out that the friend I spent 6 hours with working in my garden tested positive for coronavirus. We broke concrete, moved pots, spoke a starnge mix of Spanish and English and I was convinced that when he told me two days later that he tested positive that I would soon succumb. That in itself was a strange prospect. Sitting at home waiting for Covid to strike not knowing (I’m in my 60’s) whether you are going to have a few days of feeling a bit rough or being hospitalised and dying or any number of in between states. So there was a certain amount of anxiety. Of course you start scanning your body and “finding” symptoms. I took the tests and bizarrely it came back negative. I could do a whole post about how the track and trace system didn’t bother to contact me despite my friend telling them of our contact, of his boss pressurising him not to say he caught it off other workers, how those other workers continued to go to work despite symptoms because they were on zero hours contracts and couldn’t afford the loss of pay but I won’t. I think most of us know many of the systems in place are not up to the task in hand and that there is a high level of non compliance and restriction fatigue.

I will try and do my bit; I’ve alerted someone to the factory in question , I am joining an NHS panel trying to improve track and trace and I follow the guidelines logical or not.

So a good week overall. I’m alive and Covid free. Work is going well, I’m out of isolation and looking forward to nurturing my slightly neglected blog once again. Oh and I’m still not drinking.

Stay safe all. X

19 thoughts on “Out of Isolation

  1. nomorebeer

    omg Jim, I’m so glad you didn’t get covid! My sister’s colleague tested positive two days after they had lunch together in a closed space (thankfully you were outdoors!) and praise the lord, she came out negative. These are strange days. Anyway PLEASE DON’T ABANDON YOUR BLOG (aka. you blog friends) we neeeeeeed you (I’m trying to talk directly to your ego, I know he wants to stay^^). Last but not least: “a negative response not just to my posts but to me as a person”: WHAT? WHO? SHOW ME THIS PERSON, I will ******** them up! How dare they not realize that Jim as a person is a ray of sunshine who not only knows how to make us laugh but is also capable of shedding the jokester persona and engage more deeply and compassionately with his blogging friends and himself !!!! Show me this person and I will tell them what’s what!!!!! In the meantime, stick around uncle Jim. Let’s start that short story writing contest, maybe a little competition will help spice things up 🙂 xxxx big hugs, competition-winning-Anne ❤

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    1. Jim Simmonds Post author

      Uncle ? I thought we agreed slightly older, mum wanted us spread out out, brother figure? Oh well I shall adjust in time. The person – it was nothing really but sod it – it was Nelson and it slightly shook me as it’s contrary to how most of us are on here. We can challenge each other and joke- that’s healthy- but not seek to undermine- my mistake? I let it get to me. So silly – anyway that’s not a big deal but nice to know you’re looking out for me- now, about my knee doctor? X
      And yes short story comp- now you have plenty of time on your hands you could organise this. I’m good on ideas not on following through. You on the other hand are a doer and completer! X Go on 😀👍🏻💐

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  2. jacquelyn3534

    I’m so happy you didn’t get Covid Jim!
    Pick option 3!
    Pick option 3!
    Pick option 3!
    I was just telling myself I need to share more on here and engage more due to I really enjoy my WordPress friends! ❤️

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  3. Dwight Hyde

    So glad you’re picking option 3. You nailed it with that one beautiful word – Connect! When we become vulnerable and hit publish we instantly form connection. The ego is scared shitless, but the soul says Yes! It could be simple thoughts of the day or paragraphs we never thought in a million years we’d tell anyone. It could be encouragement to lift someone up, or just showing empathy and providing virtual hugs. All helping us feel not so alone and to have hope and a desire to keep moving forward. Excellent choice my brave friend and.. so glad you don’t have COVID😊

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    1. Jim Simmonds Post author

      Thanks Dwight, I think I’ve got to start seeing the blog more as a way of connecting and less as a series of written performances if that makes sense. You are a real rock in this community Dwight- keep that going . 👍🏻

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  4. clairei47

    Well that’s bizarre, I wrote war and peace in your comments earlier and word press clearly decided it didn’t like what I said and deleted it. I am really happy you are picking option 3 and delighted you didn’t get Covid. It’s lovely to read a post from you again. Your humour, your kindness and your support are missed when you aren’t around and I know newbies will appreciate it as much as I did when I was starting out. The comments about you from one of the other bloggers were unkind and unnecessary. They were also completely wrong and based in issues he has to deal with. I know you know that, but I also know it hurts when we are attacked. Keep posting and commenting. Personally I love your posts and Jim is a huge part of our community here. I’d love to see the short story or poetry comp take off. I know other bloggers do that as part of their blogs. Sounds fun 😁
    Xxx

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    1. Jim Simmonds Post author

      Sorry your earlier comments were deleted but thanks for commenting all over again. Your kind words mean a lot Claire and people like you make this community so special. Yes I agree a little competition would be good fun and interesting. Let’s make it happen! X

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  5. ceponatia

    Isn’t it strange how no matter the number of people who applaud us and have our back, we always remember the negative reactions most vividly? I have a similar situation although it doesn’t have anything to do with my blog. It happens MONTHS ago and I’ve completely disconnected from the person yet I still feel anxious and angry when I think about it. I understand murder, in a way. Haha… a joke. Please don’t alert the Feds!

    Definitely get where you’re coming from with the blog. I’ve recently rebooted mine with a much more laissez faire (had to look up the spelling of that one) approach and I’m still having trouble coming up with posts. I have plenty of ideas but once I get half way through them I decide they’re no good, save the draft, and never return to it. Perhaps just forcing myself to push past that and finish it anyway is the key. We’ll see. Good luck!

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    1. Jim Simmonds Post author

      Yeh it’s a natural tendency we have that makes us see the negative more than the positive and we need to actively challenge ourselves over that. I’m with you totally on the posts. More relaxed, let it flow, less uptight. Just get those posts out there. Good luck to you too.

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  6. Lovie Price

    i’ve both been through this and still do go through this..it’s SO nice to see you on here again and i look forward to future posts. after January, i struggled with just being content that i hit my original goals with the whole thing, was going to just stop posting( leaving it out there in the internet universe) and since have been on a yo yo with what exactly to focus on. Still haven’t figured it out but keep plodding along.You, along with a few others have been a major staple in my life for awhile now ( whether anyone realizes it or not). I feel a sense of honesty and community here like nowhere else online. so, thank you!!hugs!

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    1. Jim Simmonds Post author

      Oh that’s so nice to hear that Lovie. I agree about the sense of honesty and community on here and that’s something to be cherished and not taken for granted. You’re right it is special here. Long may that continue as we need this more than ever. X

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  7. gr8ful_collette

    Glad that you chose option 3! We all benefit from sharing our insights, stories and support. And I’m also glad you’re healthy. Keep making your contributions to the world. You make things better! 💕

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    1. Jim Simmonds Post author

      Hi Wendy- unfortunately the comments were made on another blog. The comments were about me and another blogger alerted me to them. I have to say they caught me off guard but I decided to just not be drawn into a slanging match. X

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